Tragic Soul Read online

  “They ready, Matt?” Chad asked.

  Matt nodded. “Sure are. Nice designs.”

  “You got them done quick,” I said as I approached the counter. Chad had only brought them in on Monday.

  With a sly smile, Matt replied, “Yeah. We do this kinda stuff in-house. Me and Aaron have a knack for it.” He set Chad’s guitar case on the counter and opened it. “Did a good job, huh?”

  My mouth dropped when I saw the skulls covering the guitar’s black section of the body and running up the neck. “Wow. Looks so professional.”

  “I do tattoos, too.” Matt winked at me.

  Chad let out a low growl. “Don’t even think about it. She’s off limits.”

  “And dating someone,” I added.

  Matt sighed. “OK, fine.” He closed Chad’s case and placed mine on top of it.

  I gasped when he opened it. It was exactly how I wanted it, with splashes of colors all over. “Amazing.”

  “This one was easier,” Matt explained. “But more fun, too.” He closed my case as well. “OK, so now for the damages.”

  They walked away from me because Chad did not want me to know how much it cost. I wondered if the instruments would attract attention. Chad’s was a work of art. I knew Paulie would be a little jealous.

  “All set.” Chad came back and grabbed both cases. “Can we go back to your room and talk?”

  I looked up at him as we walked towards his van. “I thought you had a lotta work to do today.”

  He exhaled loudly. “I do, but I need to talk more. I’ll get it done tonight.”

  I saw the emotion in his expression. The talk was going to be serious or about Natalie. “Amy may be there,” I reminded him.

  “Hopefully not.”

  When we walked into my dorm room, it was empty. Chad sat on the bed, and I stowed my guitar case in a corner. After I sat next to him, I took his hand in mine.

  “What’s going on?”

  He shrugged then squirmed around a bit. “Something Paulie said.” He put a hand up when I started to respond. “No. Wait.” A sigh passed his lips. “He was talking to Nat about you. It upset him how much pain you had been in. She said he told her I stayed with you guys all night. Then she went off about me having a threesome. I tried to explain there was no sex, but she’s…” He trailed off, at a loss for words.

  I squeezed his hand. “I’m here.”

  “Thanks.” He closed his eyes. “She’s so insecure and acting weird. Guess it didn’t help that I took her home before I spent the night with you guys. Now she’s paranoid.”

  That was a fact he had left out. I could understand why she felt slighted. However, I was glad he didn’t leave that night. Waking up several times that night surrounded by the two most important men in my life helped me tremendously. Chad directed Paulie for the most part, but Paulie seemed to be grateful for it. I heard their voices and felt them. The pain blurred the rest.

  “Anything I can do to help?” I didn’t know what else to say.

  He leaned his head on mine. “Just being here is helping.”

  I smiled and sighed. Then suddenly, he dropped my hand and hugged me. I closed my eyes and held him as well. His pain was almost tangible. Emotion started to build in me, and tears came to my eyes. I slowly ran a hand up and down his back, trying to soothe him a bit. When he hurt, so did I.

  “Maybe she’ll let it go,” he whispered. His voice broke at the last word.

  I thought for a few seconds. “Maybe we should talk to Paulie about it. He might know what’s going on with her.” He exhaled over my ear, and I almost suppressed the shudder that ran through me as my pussy moistened. When he did it again, I had to push him back. “He’s at Charlie’s. Let’s go now.” I’d do anything to stop the desire building in me for Chad.

  “You OK?” He lifted my chin with a finger. “Your lip is trembling.” He caressed it with his thumb. “Did I say something wrong?”

  I shook my head slightly. “I’m fine.”

  “You’re not, but I won’t push.” He kissed my nose. “You’re right. We should talk to him.”

  I was relieved that he let it go. The trip to Charlie’s was quiet. I felt guilty that I was still physically attracted to Chad. If Paulie knew that, he’d be devastated. I never told him how I felt for Chad beyond friendship. I sensed Chad’s eyes on me as parked at the bar.

  “Somethin’s up,” he blurted out. “What’s wrong?”

  I bit my bottom lip while I tried to think of a good excuse. None came to mind. “It’s hard to explain.”

  “I turned you on.”

  Eyes open wide, my head snapped around. “Huh?” I could feel the blush spreading across my face.

  “Knew it.” He grinned stupidly, his eyes showing how happy that made him. “Was it when I touched your neck? Or your hair? Or breathed in your ear?”

  My heart started pounding. What do I do? I started to panic. If he found out how strong my attraction to him was, it would give him the wrong idea. It might make him expect something more between us one day. My vision blurred as I imagined us dating, and then breaking up, which would mean losing him forever.

  Then suddenly, I was pushed back slightly. Chad’s lips were on mine. His fingers had combed through my hair before he grabbed the back of my neck. Instantly, I was lost in the kiss. His tongue teased mine a few times, and then dominated my mouth. I moaned involuntarily. By the time he pulled back, I was a puddle of need.

  He said, “Felt like all of the above.”

  I couldn’t reply or even open my eyes. Kissing him had always gotten to me, but it felt different. Then Paulie came to mind. “Oh, shit.”

  “What?” He squeezed my thigh.

  I pushed his hand away. “He could’ve seen us.”

  Chad looked out my window. “I didn’t think of that. Sorry.” He sighed. “Let’s go inside.”

  I was sure he was trying to let it go, so I nodded in agreement. I got out of the van, taking deep breaths. My panties were uncomfortably wet with arousal. I rushed toward the bar, not able to look Chad in the eye.

  “Crystal, wait up.” Chad halted just as he passed me then grabbed me by the arms. “Stop.” He blocked me from moving around him. “Look. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t’ve kissed you. We’re both in relationships, and we shouldn’t be doing that.”

  I slowly looked up at him. After I took a few breaths, I replied, “No, we shouldn’t.” Then I looked away again. “We need to pretend that didn’t happen.”

  He nodded and put a hand on my shoulder. Then we walked into Charlie’s. I immediately noticed Paulie bringing drinks to a table across the room. We stepped up to the bar and sat at the far end where there weren’t any patrons.

  “Hey,” Paulie said as he approached us. “Whatcha you guys doing here?”

  Chad watched Paulie as he rounded the bar to stand in front of us. Chad said, “Um, we were kinda hoping you could help me with something.”

  “Nat, right?” Paulie sighed. “That girl’s acting so weird.” He smiled at me. “Glad you’re not all about the drama. Never knew Nat could be like that.”

  I put a hand on Chad’s back. “I’m right here. Just ask him.”

  “Fine,” Chad mumbled. Then he looked up at Paulie. “Why’d you tell Natalie I spent the night with you guys?”

  Paulie’s mouth dropped. “Uh…” He looked around; obviously hoping no one heard Chad. “Uh, well, I didn’t really think it would bother her.”

  “It did,” I told him. “She’s pissed off about it.”

  Chad exhaled loudly and laid his head on his arms on the bar. “She went on and on about a threesome. Then she got all pissy about me supposedly leaving her for Crystal. She thinks we have a thing going. You gotta tell her you called me, and nothing happened. I can’t take the accusations and her crazy attitude anymore. It’s like she wants to find a reason for me to break up with her. I can’t keep doing this.”

  I felt his angst. Moving my hand to his shoulder, I squeezed. “You sho
uldn’t have to.”

  “I’ll talk to her.” Paulie leaned on the bar. “I didn’t mean to tell her. I needed to talk about what Crystal went through. It was eating at me. I feel like it’s my fault. When I said you came to help and fell asleep with us, she didn’t react at all. I had no idea.”

  The door opened, and we all turned. Natalie walked in. She was most definitely furious. When she reached us, she glared at Chad. “I was right.”

  “About what?” Chad was lost. “What’re you talking about?”

  She scowled then rolled her eyes. “They were making out in the van before they came in here. I saw them.”

  My face heated up.

  “That true?” Paulie asked loudly.

  I glanced up to see his angry expression. “Well. Yeah, but—”

  Paulie cut me off fast. “So she’s right? You guys got a thing going?” He quickly jumped over the bar to stand in front of me. “You and I need to talk now.”

  Suddenly, he dragged me to the back. I had no idea how it was going to go. Is he about to break up with me? Will that kiss ruin all we had? Thoughts flooded my mind, and none of them were good. He led me down a hallway, then into a storeroom and closed the door behind us.

  “Talk!” he shouted.

  I stepped back from him, his tone scaring me. “It meant nothing,” I said in a small voice.

  “First time you kissed him?”

  Staring at the floor, I replied, “No.”

  “What the fuck?” He started pacing. “How long’s this been goin’ on?”

  “You don’t understand.” I grabbed his hand. “Before you… Before you, we kinda messed around some. After you and me started dating, that changed.” I chanced a look at him. He was listening. “I wouldn’t cheat on you. You gotta know that. Chad was upset, hurt. It just kinda happened.”

  Paulie stared at me for a few seconds. Then he loudly blurted out, “It ‘just happened?’ That’s your excuse? Kisses don’t just happen. Someone makes them happen! Did you kiss him? Or did he kiss you?”

  The door opened, and Chad walked in. “Don’t yell at her. This is my fault.” He leaned on a wall. “I was in an emotional state and not thinking. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t’ve kissed her. Don’t be mad at her. She did nothing wrong. Seriously. She didn’t even know it was coming.”

  All three of us were silent for a few minutes. Then Paulie asked, “Did you talk to Nat?”

  “Yeah.” Chad turned away from us. “She’s gone.”

  I stood up straight. “What d’ you mean gone?”

  “She left me.” Chad sighed. “I knew it was coming. She was probably bored with me and used this as an excuse.”

  Paulie moved towards the door. “I’ll talk to her. Get her back here.”

  “Don’t.” Chad glanced at me with tears in his eyes. “Let her go. I’m fine.”

  I knew he wasn’t. “Chad?” I touched his arm, but he pulled away.

  “I’ll be OK,” he assured me. “I’ll take you home, and you guys can talk about this later.”

  Chapter 11

  From Charlie’s, Chad and I went to get dinner. After that, we took a drive to nowhere. It felt like he was avoiding being alone. When I finally opened the door to my dorm, I was surprised to see Amy sitting on her bed doing nothing. I had rarely seen her in the last few weeks. I thought about it then, and remembered that when I did see her, she seemed distant and unhappy.

  “You OK?” I asked as I approached her.

  Chad came in behind me but didn’t say anything.

  Amy looked up at me. “I’ll be fine.” Her eyes were rimmed with tears.

  “What happened?” I sat on her bed. She played with her hands in her lap. I could see her fighting her emotions. “Need to talk?” I shed my jacket and let it fall to the floor.

  Chad quietly walked around Amy’s bed to mine and sat down. “I can leave, if you want me to.” He had been about to take off his jacket.

  “No, Chad.” Amy glanced at him. “Please don’t leave.” Her eyes moved from him to me a few times. “I finally broke up with Raj. He cheated again. I caught him fucking my best friend.” The floodgates suddenly opened, and she buried her face in her hands. “They were in… in his b-bed. He was fucking her and shouting her name.”

  I reached over and hugged her. “I’m so sorry, Amy.”

  She hugged me back and sobbed into my shoulder. “Why can’t I meet nice guys?”

  “I don’t know.” We stayed in that position until she calmed. I pulled back. “Anything I can do?”

  Amy sighed. “No. I gotta deal with this. It’s hard to process.”

  “Yeah,” Chad blurted out. “Tell me about it.”

  We both turned to him.

  “Sorry.” Chad stared at the floor. “Just know how you feel, Amy.”

  “You do?” Amy shifted, so she faced him. “Natalie cheated on you?” Her eyebrows narrowed with anger. “If she did—”

  Chad shook his head. “She didn’t. Someone else did.” He exhaled loudly and hung his head. “But Nat did leave me today.”

  Amy scrambled off her bed and rushed to Chad. “Aw, you poor baby.” She sat on his lap and hugged him, straddling his thighs.

  I turned away, uncomfortable. Then I looked back. Chad held her as well, but he watched me.

  He mouthed, I’m sorry. What do I do?

  I shrugged. They were both hurting. Maybe it would be good if they talked. She laid her head on his shoulder and started crying again. He patted her back and held her a bit closer.

  “It’ll be OK,” he told her and closed his eyes, showing his pain.

  Unsure what to do with myself, I stood and started for the door. When I opened it, Paulie was just outside, about to knock. “Hey. Good timing.”

  “Were you leaving?” Paulie looked me over, noticing I didn’t have my jacket on.

  I frowned. “No. I just feel out of place.”

  “Why?” His eyes opened wider when I stepped aside. “Oh. What happened there?”

  I looked back over my shoulder. “Both of them had a rough breakup today. Kinda glad they can vent to each other.”

  “Looks like she’s ready to hop on his dick,” he muttered. “Hope he don’t move on too quick. Nat doesn’t deserve that.”

  Letting out a loud breath, I turned back to him. “He’s not like that. He takes things slow, no matter what.”

  Paulie walked into the room and approached my bed, tossing his bag on the floor. “How you doing, man?”

  “Huh?” Chad’s head snapped up, a startled expression on his face. “Oh. Hey, Paulie.” He moved Amy’s hair away from his mouth. “I guess I’m OK.”

  With his lip curved down, Paulie said, “You don’t look OK. Nat just walked away from you. Wow.”

  I put my arms around Paulie’s waist. “Why don’t we take a walk and let them talk?”

  Chad lifted Amy and set her on the floor. “No. We’ll take a walk.” He gave me a look that said, Don’t leave me alone with her. He stood.

  “OK.” I stepped back from Paulie and touched Chad’s arm. “Let me know if you need me.”

  “I will.” He kissed my cheek, and then led Amy out the door.

  When the door was closed, Paulie turned to me. “We need to talk about this.”

  “Right.” I was dreading bringing it up again. “Can I take a shower and get ready for bed first?”

  He pulled me close and looked into my eyes. “You love me, not him. Right?” His worried expression hurt, but I understood why he doubted me.

  “Yes. Only you,” I assured him. “It was just a kiss. You know how impulsive he can be.”

  He sighed and nodded. “Yeah. Did you kiss him back?”

  “No.” It was an honest answer, but it was true mostly because I was too startled to kiss Chad back.

  Closing his eyes, Paulie kissed my forehead. “Good. I’ll be right here.”

  I wondered if he was actually fine with it. When he sat on my bed and leaned over to open his bag, I relaxed. That me
ant he was staying. I gathered what I needed for the shower and headed out. The shower helped me clear my mind a bit. I let the worry about Chad go.

  When I heard another showerhead turn on, I automatically covered myself. Then I softly laughed. After seven months, you would think I would be used to shared bathrooms and showers. Obviously, I wasn’t. As I washed, I listened, trying to figure out if the other person was male or female. They didn’t make a sound. Their water turned off long before I finished, so I assumed it was a man.

  After I rinsed off, I wrapped a towel around my body and collected my things. I opened my door and was shocked to see Paulie already in bed, his hair wet. “That was you?”

  “Yep.” He winked at me. “I thought about jimmying the lock on your stall and joining you. But then I figured, you’d probably scream.”

  I set the things in my hands on my dresser. Then I approached the bed. After taking a look around to be sure we were alone, I dropped my towel and got into bed with him. He was as naked as I was.

  “Is there anything more to talk about?” Paulie asked as he lay on his side, looking at me and playing with my hair. “Or did you tell me everything?”

  Unsure if he was truly over it, I replied, “I told you everything.”

  “Good.” He moved closer, letting me feel his growing cock. “I need to fuck you,” he whispered in my ear. His lips brushed over my ear, down to the lobe. “Need to cum in you.” He groaned as he pressed into my hip.

  I slid a hand over his abdomen, then grasped his shaft. The slight gasp from him made me smile. My other hand moved to his chest as I turned to him. Silently, we shifted closer. Then our lips met. They were soft kisses at first, but urgency built quickly. I continued to stroke him as he reached between us. I whimpered when he rubbed my clit.

  A finger slipped inside of me, and my head went back. He took advantage, trailing his lips over my throat and neck. “So easy to get you wet.” He grinned, then kissed me again. Suddenly, he had me on my back. “Enough foreplay.”

  I grabbed his shoulders as I wrapped my legs around his back. My eyes closed when the head of his erection prodded my opening. We gasped together as he pushed in. I gripped him tighter. His arms slid under my shoulders, holding me close. Our bodies melded together. Our hips moved as one.