Tragic Soul Read online

  A Triple Threat Book

  Tragic Soul

  by

  Bella Jeanisse

  a XynoAfterDark novel

  This title contains sexually explicit content and is only intended for Mature Audiences.

  © 2015 Bella Jeanisse

  published by

  Xynobooks, LLC

  *Publishing New Authors for the Next Century*

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  All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced in whole or in part, or stored in any retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without the express written permission of the publisher.

  This novel is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in an entirely fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

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  Table of Contents

  Preface

  Tragic Soul came about because there was too much to Triple Threat’s backstory to fit in one book. This one bridges the gap between Reckless and Triple Threat. However, it does not end just before Triple Threat begins. Hopefully, you will recognize why I ended where I did. If not, just ask, and I’ll remind you who Crystal meets in the last chapter.

  This book was not easy to write. Paulie has become one of my favorite characters. The good news is you will see him again in upcoming books, including Evolving Urges, Dual Desires and Main Street’s story. He aged a few years by then, but in my eyes is even hotter. I have something very special in store for him. You’ll see.

  If you have read Triple Threat and Rubbed Raw, you should remember Chad, Crystal and Giovanni talking about some things that happen in Tragic Soul. Most of the memories from the earlier books that were in Tragic Soul’s timeframe were put in, and some were expanded to full scenes. I hope you recognize them when they come up and enjoy getting to see Crystal’s side of them.

  Since this is set back a few years, I tried to keep to music from that era, but that never works. I’m quite obstinate. The usual influences were dominant: Avenged Sevenfold (I really wish I could thank these guys for real,) Slipknot, Saliva, Papa Roach, Stone Sour, Seether, Three Days Grace, Metallica and Shinedown.

  I have the best group of beta readers and an incredible team of “assistants.” Thanks to all of you. In no particular order: Paula, Geri, Patricia, Donna, Anita, Christa, Naiana, Stephanie, Margo, Traci, Jena, Sonia, Melissa, Sarah, Casey, Courtney. Sorry if I forgot anyone! I’m always grateful to you all. I’d be nothing without you guys!

  Table of Contents

  Preface

  Chapter1

  Chapter2

  Chapter3

  Chapter4

  Chapter5

  Chapter6

  Chapter7

  Chapter8

  Chapter9

  Chapter10

  Chapter11

  Chapter12

  Chapter13

  Chapter14

  Chapter15

  Chapter16

  Chapter17

  Chapter18

  Chapter19

  Chapter20

  Chapter21

  Chapter22

  Chapter23

  Chapter24

  Chapter25

  Chapter26

  Chapter27

  Chapter28

  Chapter29

  Chapter30

  Chapter31

  Chapter32

  Chapter33

  Chapter34

  Chapter35

  Chapter36

  About the Author

  Sneak Peek: Evolving Urges

  Sneak Peek: Courier

  Sneak Peek: Ladies of Market Street

  Sneak Peek: And Then Her Mouth

  Chapter 1

  The Saturday after Christmas, I woke up alone in Paulie’s bed. We had been together for four months by then. So far, things were going good. I turned over and looked around the room. He was nowhere to be seen.

  “Paulie?” I fell back on the pillow as I called out to him.

  His voice came from beyond the closed bedroom door. “Be right there, Crystal.” Seconds later, the door opened. “Sorry. I let you sleep. You feeling OK? When I got up, you barely moved.”

  I stretched. “Think so. A little achy maybe.”

  “Was I too rough last night?” He sat on the bed next to me and laid a hand on my thigh.

  Shaking my head, I replied, “No. I mean my muscles.” My eyes closed, and I groaned. “Oh, not now.”

  “Now what?” Paulie lay down next to me and pulled me into his arms. “You work out too hard yesterday or something?”

  We had not seen each other for the last five days. He spent that time in Long Island with his family. Natalie, who was his cousin and my friend, had gone with him. They had come back the night before. He picked me up just before heading home.

  “Hey.” He squeezed me. “What is it?”

  I let the image of the night before go and sighed. “I think my period’s gonna start.”

  “Last time it wasn’t bad at all.” He kissed my temple.

  Since he had only seen one cycle, and it had been a mild one, I grimaced. “Sometimes it gets pretty bad.” I didn’t want to be graphic, but I thought he needed to know. “If it starts, I may wanna go home.”

  With a concerned tone, he asked, “Do you wanna stay here today?”

  “No. My parents are expecting us.” It was a family tradition to have extended family over the weekend after Christmas. Many family members would be traveling in for the event. “I’ll let you know if it gets bad.”

  He nuzzled my neck. “Will it be worse since you haven’t had a period in like, three months?” His hand lazily caressed my arm.

  I sighed. “Doubt it. That’s not how it usually works.” I didn’t want the day ruined, but I had no control. With my gynecological issues, there was no telling what it was going to be like.

  “I’ll be by your side if it’s bad. Promise.” He pulled away some and let me fall onto my back. Then he climbed on top of me. “Love you.” He pressed his lips to mine. “Let’s go make breakfast.”

  I smiled and looked into his eyes. “Love you, too. Good idea.” I sighed. “Guess I haveta get up.”

  “Yep.” Paulie got to his knees and tugged me to a sitting position. “Eggs or eggs?”

  I rolled my eyes. “How can I choose?”

  His cooking skills were limited. I taught him almost everything he knew about it. After putting on one of his T-shirts, I followed him to the small kitchen. It didn’t take us long to make and eat breakfast. Then it was off to my family home.

  “Who’s gonna be there?” Paulie asked as he drove across town. He didn’t openly express his anxiety, but it was obvious to me.

  I closed my eyes. “My brothers.” The groan from him was soft, but I understood. When he met them a few months before, they went into “protective mode” fast. “They’ve chilled out about the age difference,” I assured him. Him being 21 and me being 18 upset Cameron more than Gavin, but my best friend, Chad, set them both of my brothers straight for me.

  “Please don’t tell them you spent the night at my place.” His knuckles turned white when he gripped the steering wheel harder. “I’m sure that’d earn me a broken nose.”

  My hand moved to his thigh, and I squeezed. “I won’t say anything. They won’t harass you. Promise.”

  “How d’ you know?” He didn’t sound convinced.

  I sighed. “My dad really likes you. Cameron won’t confront you again.”


  “If he takes a swing, I’m hiding behind Chad.”

  Unable to help myself, I burst out laughing. “Natalie’ll protect you.”

  “I’m not hitting your brother.” He glared at me for a few seconds. “That’d really make a great impression.”

  Slowly, my laughter died. “It’s gonna be fine. Please, relax.” Nothing more was said until he parked a few houses down from my parents’ place. “Paulie? I’ll stay by your side the whole time.”

  “OK.” He turned off the engine. “Wait. What if you haveta pee?”

  I giggled. “If you need to follow me to the bathroom, I guess I’ll—”

  “It’s not funny.” Paulie angrily got out of the car. “Cameron scared the shit outta me. Before he left last time, he told me he’d hunt me down if I hurt you.”

  “That asshole.” I stood on the other side of the car and waited for him to come to me. “I’m gonna tell him to back off.”

  Paulie’s eyes widened as he approached me. “No. Don’t. I don’t want him to know his threat worked.”

  “What’d ya mean, worked?” My eyebrows furrowed. “You sayin’ you don’t love me?”

  He groaned. “No.” He grabbed my hands and pulled them to his chest. “I meant I’m kinda afraid of his wrath if you and me ever have a fight.”

  “I won’t tell either of them if we do.” I stepped forward and leaned my head on his strong chest. “You should know everyone there.”

  We stood there for about a minute before heading to the house. I gripped Paulie’s hand tightly as we walked through the front door. He squeezed mine as we made our way from room to room, greeting family, friends and neighbors. We found Chad and Natalie near the back door.

  “Hey, man.” Chad put out a hand to Paulie. “Glad you didn’t have to work.”

  Paulie was a bartender at Charlie’s, a popular local bar. “ ’Sup, Chad.” He gave Chad a half hug. Then he turned to Natalie. “Glad to be back, too?”

  “Yeah.” Natalie grinned as he hugged her tightly. “Missed my boyfriend.” She pulled back, grabbed Chad’s hand and gazed into his eyes. “Couldn’t stay away.”

  I was happy for Chad but still just a bit jealous. They were good together. Natalie had not dropped him as I had worried she might. We went on many double dates, which told me how Chad was really feeling. I had never seen him so happy.

  “Crystal?” my mother, Pam, called to me. “Can you and Natalie help me set up the buffet?”

  I let Paulie’s hand go. “We’ll be right back.”

  “Lemme help.” Paulie’s eyes widened when they set on Cameron in the next room. “Uh, well, maybe…”

  I tugged him into the kitchen and gave my oldest brother a death glare. “Don’t you dare bother him today.”

  Cameron put his hands up. “I was just comin’ to say hello. I swear I’ll keep the threats to a minimum this time.” He grinned and nodded his head at Chad. “I got my minions watching out for you, anyway.”

  I glanced at Chad, who shrugged. Then I turned back to Cameron. “There’s nothing to worry about. Paulie’s good to me.”

  “Better be,” Cameron mumbled and walked to Gavin, the middle child of my family.

  Rolling my eyes, I shook my head. “Fuckin’ pain in the ass. Ignore him.” My brothers went overboard way too often.

  “Wow, three times in one year?” Josh, Chad’s oldest brother, shouted as he walked towards my brothers. “Is this a new record?”

  I had to smile. Josh was right. They rarely visited, but that year they had come to see me play a show, for my mother’s birthday and for Christmas. That had not happened since they moved away. Chad, our brothers and me grew up living next door to each other. It made us almost as close as siblings.

  Focusing on what my mother needed, I turned to the oven, where several hot dishes waited. The four of us worked together, and the buffet was ready quickly. The room soon filled, as everyone smelled the amazing spread.

  After dinner, Chad turned to my father. “Pop, you mind if we go hang out in Crystal’s room?”

  “If the door stays unlocked.”

  I glanced at Chad, shocked Pop didn’t say “open.” Chad shrugged and led the way upstairs. Paulie and I followed, hand-in-hand. We started dating shortly before I left home, and he had never seen my room.

  “Daaamn,” Paulie said as he glanced around the room. His eyes roamed over the Gasoline posters covering the walls. “You’re obsessed, huh?” He laughed.

  I scowled at him and slapped his arm. “I’m not obsessed.”

  “Only about Tommy Fischer,” Chad clarified as he grinned. “She’d jump him in a heartbeat.” He dodged my hand when I swung at his arm. “It’s true, baby.”

  Natalie stepped in front of him and looked up at him. “You promised.”

  “I can’t help it.” Chad sighed. “I been calling her ‘baby’ forever. What’s the big deal?”

  Paulie tugged me aside. “I kinda don’t like it, either.” He held me close. “I just deal with it.” He kissed my forehead. “It’s not like he hits on you.”

  “OK.” I had worried Paulie was jealous.

  Chad and Natalie dating had changed a few things for Chad and I. Unlike when he had been with other girls, he didn’t come on to me when we were alone. The last time we had kissed was the night he had caught Paulie and me in bed. It was different for us both to be happy in a relationship. A good sort of different.

  I turned my head when music suddenly started to play. Chad had put the radio on. My CD collection was in my dorm. I lay my head on Paulie’s chest and listened to Linkin Park’s “Bleed It Out.” My body moved to the quick beat, not quite dancing.

  “I like this one, too,” Paulie said as I felt him banging his head to the beat.

  When the song changed to “Forever” by Papa Roach, I grinned. It was slow and had a bit of a sensual feel to it. I put my hands in Paulie’s back pockets and swayed my body to the music.

  “I saw these guys once at Irving Plaza,” Paulie whispered into my hair. “Amazing show. I’d love to see ’em again.”

  “Sounds good.” I bit my lip and pulled his body closer. Within seconds, his cock started to harden. “Feels good.”

  Paulie bent down. “Chad’d kill me if he could hear what I’m thinkin’.” He exhaled across my ear. “I was thinking about fuckin’ you up against that wall. Your back pressed up against Tommy Fischer, there.”

  I shivered, wishing we were alone. “If only.”

  “When we get back, you’re mine.” He walked me backward until I hit the wall and pressed his body into me. “All mine.” He growled softly, his lips near my ear. “Gonna—”

  Chad cleared his throat. “Uh, I’m in the room, guys.”

  I blushed, realizing we had become oblivious to the other couple. “Paulie, stop.”

  “Soon.” He sucked my earlobe into his mouth and sighed. Then he stepped back. “Sorry, Chad. Got carried away.”

  Chad exhaled loudly as he tried not to glare. “I get it, but I don’t wanna see it.” A jealous expression crossed his face. “Maybe we should go back downstairs.”

  I shook my head and crossed the room to him. “Not yet. We could play a game or something.”

  Natalie laughed as she watched her cousin. “I’m not playing strip poker with you. I seen enough.” Her cheeks reddened slightly as she made a face of disgust. “Ew.”

  It took me a few seconds to understand what she meant. Then I remembered the picture she saw on my phone, and that she had seen Paulie naked in my dorm room. It never dawned on me how that affected her.

  “Not what I was thinking,” I assured her. “I meant like a board game.”

  Chad went into my closet and reached up to the boxes there. He took down several games we had played for years. “Reminds me of when we were kids.” He laid them on the bed. “Anybody got a preference?”

  We sat on the floor playing Trivial Pursuit, Chad’s favorite. He usually won. This time, though, Paulie gave him a run for his money.
I had no idea he was so intelligent. Well, I knew he was smart, but he knew things that most people didn’t.

  “Chas Newby,” Paulie answered smugly.

  Shaking his head, Chad replied, “How the hell did you know that?”

  “I knew that, too,” I offered. My mother being the biggest Beatles fan I ever knew gave me an advantage, though. Not many knew the Beatles that made it big were not all original members of the band.

  Paulie smiled. “I got a lotta useless info in this head of mine.” He tapped his skull. “Too bad it can’t make me money.”

  “It would on like, Jeopardy or something.” Natalie rubbed his arm. “He always sells himself short. He’s the genius of the family.”

  I grinned, proud to be his girlfriend. “Told you I was attracted to your mind.”

  “Among other things,” Natalie mumbled, then cracked up laughing.

  The bedroom door opened suddenly. We all looked up to see Will. “Uh, Chad. Nick came to say goodbye.”

  My eyes opened wide. Nick was someone Chad and I grew up with. He joined the Army right out of high school. No one had told me he was in town. “Goodbye” meant he was being deployed. But to where?

  “Baby, relax.” Chad looked into my eyes. “He’s gonna be fine.” His eyes showed concern, though.

  I stood up. “Where’s he shipping off to?”

  Chad quickly grabbed my arms. “We didn’t know how to tell you.”

  “Iraq?” My mind started reeling. The month before, one of Josh’s friends had been killed when his helicopter was shot down. “Why d’ ya hide things from me?” I smacked Chad’s chest, trying to hold back tears. “I’m not a baby.” Although, I felt like one. Fear and worry filled me.

  Pulling me into a hug, Chad whispered, “After Adam, I thought you’d be upset.”

  “I am.” I closed my eyes, and a few tears fell. In my heart, I knew freedom was not free. Sacrifice was necessary, but when it was someone close, it hurt. “When?”